Last Memorial Day I looked something like this.
My friend Brittanie was out to visit for the weekend, and I sang the National Anthem for the Memorial Day service at our local cemetery with my sister and her friend, which is no small feat when one's lungs are that squished.
But the organizers of the service neglected to tell us that right after we sang (i.e. in the silence), there would be a 21-gun salute. So we were standing there with our backs to the guns all innocent-like, and they fired three times, and WOW you should have seen my belly jump. The rest of me jumped too, but little unborn Liam was definitely not expecting that noise. I still think that might be what put me into labor exactly 12 hours later.