5.10.2011

So you want to be an Eddington?

That is great!
There are a few things you should probably know beforehand.

First - musical talent is not required.  This is a widespread myth.  Sure, it wins you major brownie points and admiration (especially while singing around the piano), but just ask the manly in-laws.  If you are an otherwise excellent person, not having musical abilities will not be a deal-breaker.

You know what is a deal-breaker?  High-maintenance lifestyle.  If you are the type of girl who spends $100 every six weeks on a hair appointment 100 miles away, I can tell you right now, you and I will not understand each other.

Also not required: snow sport skills, water sport skills, nunchuck skills, or video game skills.  Phew!
Boggle skills are good, just as long as you don't beat me.

Definitely required: hard work.  I am not joking about this.
Your mother may not have birthed you for the sole purpose of watching you work. (Lucky you!)
Your family may not have spent every single Saturday working together - out in the yard, in the house, painting, growing a garden, feeding animals - in addition to daily chores.  You may not have lived in a house with SEVEN bathrooms, nine bedrooms and no maid.  But hey. You can always learn.

Not appreciated: inappropriate humor.  I know, I know, many of you think Meet the Fockers and Superstar and Dumb and Dumber are hilarious.  But you know what?  We turn it off.  We're funny enough without it.  I bet you are too.

Another thing you should know is that we are serious about our Toyotas.  Oh, how we love Toyotas!
The last four cars my Dad's bought for himself have been Avalons.  Three families now have Siennas.  I fantasized about Priuses before all the celebrities bought them.  And I am telling you, my next car will be a Scion xB.  Yes, I know they are ugly.  Yes, I still want one real bad.

Other things we are serious about:
Cutco
Dan in Real Life
BYU football
BYU everything (But don't worry, we're not all crazy anti-U.  There are plenty of U graduates among us.)
parties
parties with food
parties with ice cream
parties with homemade rootbeer
Muppets from Space
Saturday morning pancakes
homemade syrup
MUSIC

 ... and I think that about covers it.

Any questions?


Post-edit:
I neglected to mention the way we typically find our eternal companions.  With one notable exception, we have all - parents included - married friends from high school.  This means SIX high school marriages.  So I guess if you really want to be an Eddington, you better know one in school, or be a professional athlete.

8 comments:

Fig said...

I would fail miserably as an Edd, due to item numbers 2, 4, and 5. Which, interestingly, also make me an odd choice for a Gilb. Too bad they can't return me and get their money back.

"Otherwise excellent person" made me very happy. New phrase: adopted.

I like Edds!

Linnea said...

Hahaha, I love it. I think I actually could perhaps fit in as an Eddington, except that I am not big on cleaning bathrooms. And I don't really care about Toyotas, but I don't care much about any car brand. My family just drives Saabs and Volvos because they're Swedish.

Jean said...

Ha! Fig, I was NOT talking to you re: #2. But the money back ... maybe Viv will make up for it? :)

Leia, I am not big on cleaning bathrooms either. Actually I am a semi-failure as an Edd, as far as housekeeping goes. But a Volvo? I'd take one anytime!

Angie said...

This is quite the list! And I agree with everything. You might want to include a certain ability of cow-chasing is also required. Pretty funny. Glad to be an Eddington!

Jean said...

oh heavens! Chasing cows and llamas at the Lost Cow Ranch! You are so right!

Heather said...

I think this needs to be posted on our other blog too. :) I love it! So true!

Eliza said...

This was AWESOME! And so much of it was true for my corner of the Eddington family. Saturday morning pancakes? You know it!

Eliza said...

This was AWESOME! And so much of it was true for my corner of the Eddington family. Saturday morning pancakes? You know it!
(This is Eliza by the way)