For Lu: The Nursing

I think we can all agree that breastfeeding is best, and according to the World Health Organization your baby should have nothing but breastmilk until six months old, yadda yadda you can nurse until two years and beyond.
I think we can also agree to not judge each other.

I started feeding Liam baby food before he was five months old.  All signs said he was completely ready for them, and I don't care if someone thinks that he will be obese in five years because I fed him early.  He slept well, and he was a happy baby.  He also basically weaned himself around 9 months.
MG, on the other hand, is nowhere near ready for solids.  She doesn't even like to taste our food.  I've started feeding her formula bottles with a little rice cereal in them to beef her up, and still, she is tiny.

Point is - you're the mama, do what you think is best.
I can't give much helpful nursing advice through a blog post, but, here's a list of things that have been valuable to me as a breastfeeding mother.

1. Lanolin cream.  My dear Tay gave me some Lansinoh and suggested that I start using it weeks in advance.  I did, but probably not as faithfully as I should have.  I still cracked and bled a little.

2. Nursing pads.  Honestly, I haven't needed these much.  Like, maybe ten times and mostly in the night.  So I never used them regularly and I don't know which ones are best.  Sorry.

3. Pump.  I've used a few and liked both this one and this one just fine.  Don't use the one you get from the hospital, it's awful.

4. Boppy pillow.  Not everyone loves these.  I did.  I could nurse Liam and still use the computer (ha!).  Also, sometimes I dozed off during the nighttime feedings, and it was nice to have him cradled in the thing instead of falling out of my sleepy arms.

5. Nursing bras and/or camisoles.  Buy yourself some decent ones, you'll use them to death.  The Motherhood Maternity salespeople can be very helpful.  Think about a couple things when you're looking: clothes you normally wear, activity level, comfort, size, padding.  I never really needed a sports or sleep bra, didn't want underwire, did want padding.  Try on a few at Motherhood Maternity or Target, and buy the ones you like.  I never wore the 3 cheapo ones I bought.

6. Tops.  I didn't realize how tight-fitting all my shirts were until I had to nurse with them.  Then I went out and bought 7 new shirts.  One way around this, if your shirts need camisoles underneath (mine did), is to buy nursing camis or halftees, or a bra like this that can pass as a camisole .... but you'll probably want a white one. Ahem.

7. Special underwear.  DON'T buy nursing tops, they will make you furious.  Any top with a stretchy neckline will do - cotton or carinessa.

8. Nursing covers, if you want them.  I use mine mostly at church.  They're much easier to use than blankets, and don't have to be anything fancy.

9. True grit.  You will be in exceedingly great pain for at least a few weeks.  Just plan on it, and know that it will end, and know that it's worth it.
When I first started nursing I thought it was inconvenient.  Now that I have to supplement with formula, I know better; compared to bottle-feeding, nursing is suuuuuper convenient.
Just a thought.

For Lu: The Birthing

For this post I'll try to cover both medicated and unmedicated childbirth, and what helped me most with both.  Of course, any other moms are welcome to add your own advice in the comments!

There are a few major things that I wish I would have implemented during my first birth experience - because they made all the difference with the second.  Things will always come up that you didn't expect, but if you prepare yourself, you can handle whatever happens.  With that said, here's "what I wish I'd done."

Home:  Stay at home for as long as possible.  Really.  I knew that I should, and with Liam I thought I was waiting, but no.  Checking in and hearing the words "You're a 1+" will crush your spirit like a cinderblock.  You'll be anxious to get to the hospital - don't let it get to you. Time your contractions, eat and drink as much as you can (even though you won't feel like it), do projects if you need to distract yourself.  I baked cookies for the nurses on the day I was laboring at home.  Surprise!  The nurses loved them.

Move:  Don't just lie there; you've got to move around.  Per my Hypnobabies training, with MG I changed my position after every contraction.  It was tough.  I'd get comfortable, handle a contraction well, and want to stay that way.  But I forced myself to move and I am quite convinced it sped up the process.
With Liam, I discovered that I could handle the pain better if I was on my feet.  I stood for every.single.contraction. until I got an epidural, even when I was on Pitocin and hooked up to IVs and monitors.  That was probably 12 hours' worth.  I don't know, I just couldn't bear to sit there.

Position of the Baby: I know, I sound totally paranoid about having another posterior baby.  That's because I am.  YOU DO NOT WANT THIS TO HAPPEN.  A posterior baby will cause more painful contractions and slower progress, back labor that the epidural may not anesthetize, harder and longer pushing, better likelihood of tearing/episiotomy, you understand me??
And really, it's quite preventable.  There are ways to turn your baby, if you know that you need to, before you get an epidural and can't move.  Ask your nurses, ask the doctor.  If they check you and mention that "it's possible," you jump on that and demand a definite answer! Text me for ideas on how to turn her! Do what you have to do!

Relax: So, with all the moving and contracting and demanding answers from nurses, this may not seem like a high priority.  But it really is.  In hindsight, I think my lack of confidence may have hurt me more than anything (besides the posterior-ness) with Liam.  Your body knows when you are scared, and it will work against itself if you're as terrified of childbirth as I was.  You have got to believe in yourself.
You've got to believe that God created your body, and that your body is capable of giving life.  No matter your character flaws or low pain tolerance or whatever, you are capable.
Relax and let your body do its work, then relax and relax again.  Breathe.  Focus inward.  Talk yourself through it, talk your baby through it.  Cry if you need to.  Pray.
Lean on your husband.

And if you need to utilize the wonders of modern medicine, don't let it - or anyone - get you down.  That doesn't mean you're less of a person.  It means you made a decision.  Praise the Lord that we even have these options.

Finally,
Stand your ground.  I wish everyone could have the awesome doctor/staff/hospital that I do, but unfortunately, most of you live in big cities with big-time hospitals and strict regulations and possibly uptight caregivers.
Sorry.
Anyway, don't be afraid to ask for what you need.  And if something happens that you don't like, don't be afraid to ask questions.  Like, why are you doing this?  And, are there other options?  Often nurses do things just to follow normal procedure - which doesn't mean they can't make exceptions for you.
(I can give specifics if you want.)

In the end, it's your body, your baby, your experience.  I loved it when my doctor told me "There are lots of right ways to have a baby!"  because it's true.  The important thing is to get her here safe and sound.  Once she's here, life as you know it is over.
Because once you're a mother, you are a different person.  And you'll wonder how you ever felt like a whole person before you were a mother.

Next: The Nursing

For Lu: The Bag

I'll be writing a few posts for my pregnant friends about the things that I know now, after birthing two children (even though I am younger than all of you) and having two vastly different experiences.

Firstly, the hospital bag.  With Liam I had mine packed weeks in advance.  Second time, I was packing it while I was dilated to a 5 (guessing here), and I forgot/neglected things both times.  I suggest you pack:

• Comfortable clothes.  Comfy slippers (and/or good walking shoes), PJs, stretchy pants and shirts. Some comfy undies. A robe if you want.  Some people make their own "cute" hospital gowns, but a hospital gown is a hospital gown - and I didn't wear one either time.  I prefer to wear regular clothes.
• Good walking shoes for the husband.  Slice complained about his feet for days after Liam was born.
• Towels that are larger than a hand towel, for showering.  Take a couple.  Maybe red ones.
• Toiletries.  The basics, don't forget lotion and chapstick. 
• Pillows, if you are particular about yours. 
• Food.  You will not be allowed to eat while you're in labor.  And if you're in labor at the hospital for eighteen hours after not eating dinner the night before, you will be weak and shaky and STARVING - and doing the hardest work of your life.  So, take some snacks that are easy on the stomach.  You might see them again.  (Sorry, but I did.)
• Nursing stuff. Nursing bra/tank, lanolin cream, a couple nursing pads just in case.  
• Baby stuff.  An outfit or two, one with legs for the carseat on the way home.  Ask me if I learned that the hard way.
• Cameras and journals.  If you're a better person than I am, that is.  I have hardly any pictures from the hospital (especially with me in them), and I'm terrible at journaling and baby book stuff.  Just started on MG's last week.
• Mobile devices.  I've had playlists and audio books and semi-constructive things to do, but I never did any of it.  I watched TV and checked Facebook and played Tetris on my phone.  And slept.  You should have options.
• Cords for said mobile devices.  Again, ask me if I learned this the hard way.
• More food.  I eat constantly for days after giving birth.  Mostly junk (chocolate).  I don't feel guilty about it either.

I hope the hospital provides (and if they don't, you'll need to get):

• Plenty of blankets, pillows for you and your husband
• Pads - LOTS and LOTS of them, stool softeners, Tucks pads, and maybe antibacterial spray
• Swaddling blankets, diapers & wipes, pacifiers, hand mitts

Some people take their Boppy pillows, and flip-flops for the shower.  I haven't needed either.  Some people also take copies of their Birth Plan, and signs to put on their door, and incense and essential oils and music players and what have you.  I haven't.

Next up: The Birthing

Then Slice came home and we were all okay.

We are finally back among the living, as they say.
Time for a rambling, picture-filled post!

First, Lu, since you wanted to hear about the good parts of our AZ trip, here are the (only) photos I took on my phone while we were there:

And after we came back:

Poor kids.  They both slept a lot, for a week, which was nice.  But then they got better and I got worse (sinus infection), so it was pretty rough - even with Ki around helping a BUNCH - until Slice got off work and saved me from utter destruction.  

In other news, MG is finally growing.  We started giving her formula bottles once or twice a day.  I'm just not making enough milk, and I've known it all along, but she's had some "nipple confusion" (as they say) so I've been hesitant to give her a bottle EVER.

We're over it.

She loves bottles, and she's growing into 0-3 month clothes, now that she is four months old.  So that's good.

(Also, I get to watch Liam feed her and it melts my heart.)

In OTHER other news, the new house is a no-go.  Slice simply will not be convinced.  I can't blame him, really, it's just this whole "putting the kids in the same room" thing that I've been living in fear of for probably a year now.  Once that is done I will buckle down and fix up this old thing, for at least a little more time of living in it.


And I'm off.

People

Wouldn't it be great if you could pick your neighbors?
I mean really pick them.

How would you like to find a great place to live and then fill the adjoining houses and streets with your favorite people?
Those people that you don't see enough of no matter how close/far they live from you?
The people that you bring up in conversations with other people and end up saying "I just love them" to the ones you know best?
The people you think about when you have hard decisions to make, and you try to imagine what they would do in your shoes?
The people you want to be more like?

I've got a mental list of mine - my favorites, that is - and I've been thinking a lot about how I'd love to live closer to them all.  To play and work and learn and raise my family with them.

I only just realized - that's heaven.

All Things

If this is true, then the past week has prepared me for something really awesome that's going to happen soon.

How's that for optimism?

Here are a few things that we've done since Monday:
2 visits to Urgent Care
2 positive strep tests (one negative)
2 ear infections
2 different antibiotics prescriptions
2 boxes of tissues
2 quarts of grape juice that I drank yesterday
2 days of hibernating in my humidified room, trying to get MG over her terrible cough
2 loads of laundry that flooded the basement a little
2 hundred other loads of laundry from the diarrhea and barfing and vacationing
  (well, that's a bit of an exaggeration)
2 hundred diapers changed
  (only a slight exaggeration)
6 new Disney/Pixar movies - thanks to Ebay!

and

2 showers for favorite roommates that I MISSED.

So what do you think it could be?  A new house??

Vacation

If the "best vacation ever" can consist of

• major driving delays
• sleepless nights
• sick, sick kids (not limited to: croupy cough, high fevers, diarrhea, runny nose)
• running out of gas on the 101
• storm of the season
• losing the iPod touch that I gave Slice
• backseat barf on the way home

Then yes, we just had the best vacation ever.

Pins I did

I hear that Pinterest is the new great time-waster.
Not for me!

Rather than pinning every little thing I like (thereby creating a lovely but useless "inspiration board"), I only pin things that I PLAN TO DO/BUY/MAKE/USE --- SOON.  I also routinely go through and delete pins that I don't need anymore or have realized won't help me.
It's an enriching thing, really.

Done:
Chip clips from old hangers
Funny-smelling towel trick - it worked
Silverware silhouettes - mine look like this:

Golf theme birthday cake - but mine were delicious mint brownies, and I ran out of time, so the "rough" turned into the "green" and it ended up looking like this:

And, "Best-ever chocolate chip cookies." I've made them three times, but mine end up looking like this every time:

Any pins that you recommend?

the life

Well well. Time flies when you're alternately crazy busy and crazy tired.
This week we had a photo shoot, a Park City shopping trip, two days of baby-sitting, and an electrical problem thrown into the normal schedule.

MG is still not sleeping well (waking up 2-3x a night) which makes me much less of a person than I would like.   After months of stewing about all the things I'm not getting done, I finally decided to give myself a guilt-free card.  It says "Don't feel guilty for the things you're not getting done until you are sleeping at night."
(You can have one of those cards too.)
Anyway, if you saw the current state of my house you would know what I mean.

Tuesday we took newborn pics of a sweet baby girl in our ward, and I couldn't believe how easy she was to work with.  Dude.  She put up with all the moving and uncomfortable positioning and binkie-snatching without even making a fuss. Liam & MG, did you hear that??

Speaking of photos, if you were watching the photoblog at all you may have noticed that it crashed and burned.  Yep - Slice accidentally deleted the ENTIRE WEB ALBUM that fueled the site, and I don't have the heart to go back and upload every single picture again.  Looking for other options now...

My baby turned three months old this week, which means I should probably put her in Liam's room, but I just can't do it.  I'm terrified.  The boy started opening his door and WHO KNOWS what will happen if they are in that room together?  Not sleep, that's what.
Any suggestions?

We've also been discussing big things for a few weeks, like Slice's golf goals and our Arizona trip and my piano lessons and maybe buying another house.

Did I mention our Arizona trip?
It's this week.  And it's going to be the best one ever.  Even though we're driving.
(Darn.)

fatty

MG had her 2 month check-up (a few weeks ago), at which time she weighed just under 9 pounds.

The other day I looked up how much Liam weighed at his 2 month appointment.
So guess.

Or I'll just tell you.
OVER 13.